WELCOME to the first Autism Acceptance Month blog post of 2024! Today, I wanted to take a few steps back & go over some autism terms & what they mean. I use many of these terms throughout my blog & I try to provide definitions as I write. It's always good to take the time to pause & review what some of these terms mean though. And there's no better time to do that than when we're kicking off Autism Acceptance Month! Important Autism Terms & Definitions:
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Since Valentine's Day was earlier this week, I wanted to write about love, experiencing it, expressing it, & how it looks differently for autistic people than it looks for allistic, or non-autistic people. But, before we begin... What IS Love? Love is a complex mix of emotions that is everyone in the world experiences, whether they are neurodivergent or neurotypical, autistic or allistic, disabled or non-disabled, etc. It is associated with certain behaviors & strong feelings of affection, protectiveness, warmth, & respect for other people (e.g. family, friends, romantic partners, etc.), animals, principles, interests, hobbies, &/or religious beliefs. How Autistic People Experience Love: Widespread stereotypes suggest that autistic people are incapable of feeling love, romantic or otherwise. However, the reality is that autistic people experience love quite intensely (often much more intensely than allistic people). Interestingly, brain scans of autistic people show that when we express feeling love & affection for someone, different areas of the brain are activated than for allistic people. The empathy circuitry of the brain is also working differently. We, autistic people, are typically extremely attached to our close relationships, often more so than allistic people are. This is because we usually have significantly less people that we are close to than allistic people do. Like allistic people, we have a deep desire for those types of relationships, making the close relationships we do have so much more important to us. With this being said, it is important to remember that autism is a spectrum. So, autistic people experience & express love in unique ways that can vary quite drastically from each other. Our experiences & expressions of love are greatly influenced by our individual strengths, challenges, & sensory sensitivities. How Autistic People Express Love: While autistic people feel love & empathy very intensely, often much more intensely than you do, it may be very difficult or impossible for us to express our love & empathy for you in ways that make you feel loved & cared about. Some ways that we express our love include:
Many autistic people experience what is called "limerence." This is when the person we are romantically interested in becomes a special interest. We fixate on every aspect of their being, want to learn about all of their favorite things, or start to picture the rest of our lives with them after just a few (maybe even one) interaction(s). This can sometimes lead to a devastating end when the effort isn't reciprocated or worse, we can't see that it isn't being reciprocated. Tips For Loving An Autistic Person:
Benefits Of Loving An Autistic Person:
A Few Other Things To Remember:
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AuthorHello! My name is Kim, I didn't know I was autistic until I was in my thirties, & this is my story. Categories
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